Driving Safety Advocates Pillows

'I warned him. 'Don't text and drive' ... He wouldn't listen.'

Pool attached to child's bed.

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Careful."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

Knights Wing Mirrors.

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

Boozing and Cruising

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

Speeding Forklift

'This is a new electronic child-proof cap. If you can pronounce the drug's name, it opens.'

Humpty Dumpty wearing over-the-shoulder seat belt smiles smugly.

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

"You know you have to wait an hour after eating before getting out of the water, young man!"

'Hey Dad, can I borrow the car?'

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

'I know they look geeky - but I believe lat good parenting should always come before style.'

"I keep telling him there's a big difference between swimming and floating."