Drills Gifts

"Right! Let's break for lunch!. . . . Well don't just stand on ceremony!"

Impatient Oil Drillers LTD.

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

"Lemming Boot Camp"

Dentist Training School.

"The following is a test of the fire-alarm system. It is only a test. Please ignore the intense heat and combustion."

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

A yeoman misunderstanding an order from his drill-sergeant

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

'I keep yelling at my privates.'

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

'Sir, we've drilled so deep this time that we've reached Arab oil.'

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

"Cruz! Are you eyeballin’ me? Eyes shut during savasana! You hear me? Lance, get up and give me 10 headstand pushups to help Cruz here shut her eyes."

Oil Industry Safety.

'I heard you mom is really strict.'

'Hup, two, three, four! Hup, two, three, four!'

Military ardour.

"OK, boys. Begin drilling."

'No slapping, Wilson! We don't start full-contact drills until tomorrow!'

"Is something funny, soldier?"

Passages in the Life of a Volunteer

'Another one. Do you realize that will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Oil Workers

Home Economics with an Attitude...

'March up that hill! And smile once in awhile, will you!'

Military Parades

"Folsom's seasick, sir."

"I can't heeear you!"

'Yes I floss regularly. Once every 6 months when I come here!'

'Completed the pyramid, eh? Now take it down to the ground.'

'…and if you feel dizzy and pass out - pass out lying at attention!'