Dreamy Touchdowners Gifts

Super bowl for the poor.

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

Punishment for the kicker.

'He's checking with his agent to see if it's okay to score a try!'

"Oh, wait. He's on their side."

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

'He hibernates between superbowls.'

You guys aren't living up to your preseason hype!

Penalty

Friendly fire!

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

Football

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

"And then he said he wanted $50,000 for it."

'Have you heard the fisherman's song. . .To dream the impossibe bream.'

'Your grandfather is a cautionary tale, son. He quit school early and pinned all his hopes on an NFL career. But in the end, he was never used in a single game.'

Bedtime Reading

'I want to ship Daddy to all the places he missed visiting, because he was working so hard to accumulate the estate I just inherited.'

"Okay, let's celebrate this touchdown and try not to disappoint our new offensive choreographer."

'I wanna be a hockey goalkeeper.'

Bed time stories

'Save some purrs for when I play quarterback for the Saints.'

Reading the signs of change...'Looks like this is the last day of vacation, so tomorrow it's back to school, kids...'

'Throw the ball! I can't hold them much longer - the defence shields are weakening!'

"You have a strong interest in sports."