Dreamy Slugger Gifts

Baseball Dreams

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

'At lone at last.'

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

The Giamatti era

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

Trainset

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

'Well, Jimmy, it's your turn to go get it.'

cinema

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

Directors Chair and Others.

"He can't come out to play right now...he's working on his autobiography."

"A little high and inside."

"I'm sorry but Mr. Berrell is in Port St. Lucie trying out for the Mets."

'Have you heard the fisherman's song. . .To dream the impossibe bream.'

"I'm having trouble with the ending."

'Sixteen home runs, 34 runs batted in, and nine stolen bases. I'd call that being good.'

"Will the witness please refrain from shagging flies."

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

"If I'm not in the Hall of Fame by 41 I'm getting induced."

'Are you the person I see about getting a sign-up bonus and a salary?'

"Winning isn't the only thing, Junior. It's how much money you can get in a pro contract."

One man's food coma is another man's imaginary game-wining catch.

'You're behind on every pitch, Billy! Try choking up on the bat!'

"You still need that recipe for boiling water?"

Field of Broken Dreams

'OK, that's strike two. What is your third wish?'