Double Agent Gifts

"Need a crony?"

'Sure, it's a lot of work being a double agent, but you get TWO retirement plans!'

'Sure, it's a lot of work being a double agent, but you get TWO retirement plans!'

'Sure, it's a lot of work being a double agent, but you get TWO retirement plans!'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

Barks in code.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

UK border controls relaxed.

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

Your resume begins Once Upon A Time...I like that!

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'Please keep in mind this is only a 'ruff' copy.'

"The team needs LEADERSHIP, anyone have a view on that?"

'Is this your first book launch?'

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

Meet Santa's entourage

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

BOOKS ON VIDEO/BOOKS ON TAPE/READ YOUR OWN.