Doorway Detective T-Shirts

"Hey fellows, this one's open."

Snail Peephole

'Curiosity'

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

Those missing socks...where do they go?

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

"We need to talk about procrastination."

Open entrance door to find exit door directly behind it.

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

"You're closer. You get it."

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"There's food in the fridge, and clues about the state of our marriage all around the house."

'In another universe parallel to our own.'

"This is probably how they keep getting in."

"Don't let the organized desk fool you. I have no idea where my computer files are."

'I don't know, Al... A dumpster in the middle of the woods! Seems kind of fishy to me.'

Visiting the Opera

Not only have we been laid off, but, being small, we can crawl through air ducts with ease.

'That must be the termite inspector.'

"You can use Dave's cubicle. He has Seasonal Affective Disorder and won't be using it this winter. Whoa! I guess I'm wrong. There he is, hibernating under the desk!"

"I can smell his fear of commitment."

In Agatha Christie's bathroom.

'Oooh the Timpsons have got new blinds.' (Blinds read 'Sod off you nosy cow).

Veterinary Surgeon's waiting room, dog walking in through pet door.

'Antiques are things one generation buys, the next generation gets rid of, and the following generation buys again.'

"Helene tells me you're into fabrics."

'We may find that there are hidden service charges with this place ...'

Window of Opportunity

House detective.

'Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere.'

'On second thoughts I'm sure you'd make an excellent store detective, Mr Hodgson.'