Doorstep Detective T-Shirts

"You're closer. You get it."

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"You're sure it was a Northern Bobwhite?"

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

It's a good thing our neighbors don't know what weirdos we are.

Micro and Macro Department,

Don't forget to read the small print.

"Your curriculum vitae is extremely detailed, isn't it? I don't quite know what to make of the fact that your third-grade teacher, Miss Hartley, made you stand in the corner for throwing an eraser although another kid did it."

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

Those missing socks...where do they go?

"You say in your resume that you're very meticulous."

"I just audited our books. Your register came up five cents short, Rudy."

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

Devil in the detail

When pedants take a break.

'Talk about paranoid. He reads the fine print on his money.'

"We need to talk about procrastination."

Forward Planning - The key to Success

Yesterday you lost your sheep and suddenly, today, Mary next door has a little lamb... Pretty big coincidence is all I'm sayin'.

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"There's food in the fridge, and clues about the state of our marriage all around the house."

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

'Curiosity'

'In another universe parallel to our own.'

"This is probably how they keep getting in."

'There's only one piece left. C'mon, we can figure this out.'

"Don't let the organized desk fool you. I have no idea where my computer files are."

Old lady spying on the neighbours using a webcam.

"Why is that moron screaming so loud at something that isn't there?"

"This is Clint. He handles the small print!"