Door-knocking Enthusiast Gifts

"Gods are imaginary friends that have evolved the ability to spread from one human host to another. They are communal parasites, and you are carriers."

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Macho man body building club.

"10,000 steps...just answering doorbells."

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

Man sees a sign on a door - Open At Other Side.

"Who's there?" "Who's askin'!?"

Sale: All Doors Massively Reduced!

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

The Great Out-doors

Snickle's Trapdoor Factory.

At death's door

"Not responding to a knock-knock joke isn't proof he's unconscious."

Rush hour traffic with inconsiderate drivers.

'Poor Oog -- he invented the door, and locked himself out of his cave.'

X-Ray toilets.

Married to a Honky-Tonk Man: 'Hey! Hey! Mama! Can yer daddy come home!

Bibles r us.

Traffic Signals: Caution/Stop/Honkhorn

Aspirin company - Door pushes in and turns.

welcome / Good riddance: "Over here. That's the back door."

Contrarian Society - Entrance at rear of building.

What happens if you cross a Jehovah's Witness with a Unitarian?

"Don't pretend you didn't notice the Anderson's new doorstops, too! They put ours to shame!"

'Hey! Don't you know how to knock?'

Door 2 Door salesman.

'Can I stress that this technique must only be used as a last resort.'

'I need a simple door, nothing fancy, just in, out, nobody gets hurt.'

One more ring and Bob would set off the Solicitor Glove,

Clay Pigeon Shooters' Federation...