Doomsday Debater Pillows

Memory Clinic: The end of something or other is near.

'You can take that off now.'

'You're new at this, aren't you?'

'So what made you think that doomsday prophecy would be right?'

'It was definitely a bang. You heard it, I heard it, end of discussion.'

"Whoa! In 7 billion years, the sun will expand and engulf the entire planet, melting away any evidence it ever existed!"

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"That's six 'noes' and one 'aye', the ayes have it"

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'You present a very convincing argument.'

'We need to change our marketing strategy.'

"Make sure you get payment up front."

Citizens' Jury - 'The jury thinks you should get rid of Citizens' Juries.'

Sun crashing into sea foils rescue attempt.

Democracy - one of the drawbacks.

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

'Okay, now I'm hoping he's right...'

"An election is like a car repair where the car owner has to pay a lot of money to have old broken parts replaced with new broken parts."

'Make appointments for all the people I don't like using the Mayan calendar.'

'I went in to get my mortgage renewed. I said: 'Make it for eight months and four days!'. . . Am I only the one who thinks the world ends in December?'

The Fortunes of War

Astronomers argue theories of the Universe.

"So apart from stop being 'lying hypocritical uncaring bastards who'd promise anything to get back in power'...is there anything else we might do to secure your vote?"

Professor Malinowski Failed to Impress His Audience with his Small Bang Theory.

'According to the Mayan calendar, 2012 will be the end of the world!'

Fatalism and the Seeds of Doubt

How Human Nature Works: 'Ok...Now I'm worried.'

'Grandpa, why do you like to live here in Germany?'

Parliament

WORLD ENDS TODAY!, 'You say that like it's a BAD thing.'

The end of baseball season is near