Domestic Chore Strategist Pillows

'Because you told me to run the house like a business.'

Washing Line Walker

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'My wife gave me that one for washing the windows.'

"It's your turn to throw out the dishes."

"And now your General Knowledge Round...Where does clean laundry come from?"

"Can you train him to bite my husband whenever the trash gets full?"

Wife taking a photo of her husband and their shoveled walk-way

"Just empty it."

"Oh, gosh. . . he's sleep caulking again."

"You used the right amount of detergent and fabric softener. The problem is this washing machine isn't for dishes."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

'I did my part of house cleaning, now it's your time...it's shovel ready'

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

"What is that creepy sound?" "Don't worry. It's just the ghost of the old dishwasher."

'Who's the clown responsible for ordering the new exercise equipment?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

No caption. (A woman folding laundry from the dryer is looking at a mouse folding laundry from a mousehole on the side of the dryer).

"How do you work one of these?"

You mean none of you took out the trash? Why you rarely see a female polygamist.

"I knew it would be a silly idea to ask him to hang the washing out for me,"

Nate Sure Abhors a Vacuum!

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

'My spring cleaning got spring fever.'

"Does he like those shorts you bought him for Christmas?"

'I'll see your 'Washing the Dishes' and raise you 'Two Loads of Laundry''

Professional Dishwasher Loading Championship

'Yes it's a conspiracy theory, he's never ever done the washing up.'

Feel free to have a wash but this time please do not leave the bath smelling of ham.

Home Schooling: "And this is what we call the 'washing machine'."

'I TOLD you not to wash it in warm water!'

'Did they have anything at the job centre?'

'What's your washing dishes got to do with human rights?'