Doggie Laugh Enthusiast Gifts

What are you going to do about it,Fred? It's your food.

"I was almost that last year."

"Shake! Good Dog."

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

'Don't worry, my baser instincts are in a surgical waste bin in Hoboken.'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

Balloon dog training

"He ran out of pee."

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

Cuthbert was a pit of a party animal

"The party was a total surprise! Everybody jumped out and screamed 'Happy Birthday' just as I was licking my balls!"

"Remember when we were young and could finish a round without one of us having to run off to mark his territory?"

"Bruno, sit."

'The pats on the head are nice, but I need more compensation...'

"So the old man says 'you're getting fixed,' and I'm thinkin', you know, maybe he's gonna patch up the hole in my doghouse..."

"How does it feel to be a fink, Sparky?"

"Get a life."

RING! RING! RING!: 'Not the cell phone AGAIN!'

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

'Forget about marriage conselling: Me, I sent Max to Obedience School instead...'

"You hit the ball- that's ping. Your opponent hits the ball- that's pong!"

'That's the problem with Dacshunds, you can never tell whether they're coming or going.'

Dog sees venus fly trap catch a fly and copies it...

House with 'Dog For Sale' sign. Cat walks by holding 'Good Riddance' sign.

"You say: It's nothing more than jealousy inspired backstabbing. I say: It's the fourth report of butt-sniffing I've had this week."

'You sound like a bunch of cats! The growl has to be deeper and the barks crisper. Okay, let's take it again from the first howl.'

"Let's try it again. This time with a tad less mania."

'Tell me this isn't celery.'

"I promise I won’t get upset. Just tell me why you chewed up her Chanel pumps."

"He's been watching all those cookery programmes."

"I'm sure this is an interesting story."