Doggie Joker Pillows

"Just stare up into the corner of the ceiling and growl. It really freaks him out."

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

Jogging Bottoms

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Pet owner pours out contents of treats for dog that are oddly shaped. Box titled: 'Funny Bones'.

Death Photobombs a Holiday

Complaints Desk

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'I don't mind him sleeping on our bed but why must he wear MY pyjamas?'

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

"Well, there goes your theory of him thinking of you as his pack leader."

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

False encouragement.

"She never took to the leash."

"The dog wants out again!"

Boomerang fetching

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

'For a minute there I didn't think we were gonna make it tonight!'

Outback rat house? Darn ! Wish you guys would've said somethin' sooner. I just ate a hop pocket.

"Look - the FIRST EVER picture of a black hole!! What do you think?"

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

Just another day at Helium Farm

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

AL'S GYM, 'We're going to make a new man of you!' 'Will he have new credit cards?'

"My human can't tell which end is which."

Hungry Panda Thirsty Hippo Curious Sloth

"We're expecting quite a litter this time."