Doggie Director Gifts

"If people would just do what I say, I wouldn't have to bark at them."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

Why Poodles Become Killers

Pet owner pours out contents of treats for dog that are oddly shaped. Box titled: 'Funny Bones'.

Fido and Fifi

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

Self-Employment

Cats and Dogs.

'Don't forget to talk about their dog!'

"She never took to the leash."

'No Sandra, I don't hear a whistle either. '

"You mean, with that yakerpoop app, you can have a service stop by and puck up your bag of crap?"

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

"The dog wants out again!"

'For a minute there I didn't think we were gonna make it tonight!'

"My human can't tell which end is which."

'You treated his ears last year, but I guess the medicine didn't work because he's still shaking his head!"

'I don't mind playing dead...but what I'd really like to do is direct.'

"Too goth?"

'Journey of self-discovery' Dog realizes he can make his leg move when he scratches.

"I think the dog swallowed the remote!"

Ice Cream Lover

I assume obedience class was a washout then.

'I'm teaching him to give me a doggie treat when I stay perfectly still...'

"I'm a rockhound."

'Strangest turtle I ever saw!'

"Relax, Sparky! Doctors say bone loss is normal at our age!"

Man accidentally hooks a dog while casting his fishing line.

'Has that nasty dog been bothering you again...'

'Look, I don't know what repulsive smelly thing I just ate, but I know what I like.'

'She even lies about her dog's age!'

Posh Doghouse.

Even in a family photograph, the Doberman's remained expressionless, leaving the viewer unsure if they were happy, or about to attack.