Doggie Chef Gifts

Dog Food

Raw food, after you leave for work.

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

"Can I have a doggie bag to go?"

"Pretty good dog, huh, Larry?"

"We need to put in more bones."

'This one is very effective. It sounds just like a can opener.'

Dog Chow Mein

"You're spoiling that dog again!"

Homemade dog biscuits.

"See, I told you he didn't want to go out."

Recipes.

'Sorry, chubs, but those little circles you do before lying down don't cut it as exercise.'

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

Dog Food Pyramid. Meat. Scraps.

"So, what's it to be, chicken unfit for human consumption, or beef unfit for human consumption?"

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

"Let's see . . . I detect beef . . . peas . . . and a subtle hint of sweet potato!"

'That's not exactly what I had in mind.'

'I'm taking the leftovers home, so suggest something my dog will enjoy.'

'I was hoping chef's surprise would be fish'

'Fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs and cooked beans! He gets a better dinner than I do!'

Dog Food Groups

"I need some assistance here."

Parping dog.

No caption. (Dog delivery man delivers a box labeled "Scraps" to dog customer.)

"This makes a nice change from 'Fetch'!"

"The vet said if he's not eating I should warm up his dog food a little.'

'See what happens when you let him cook.'

'It's the Animal Welfare people about you feeding leftovers to the dog!'

"Your 'presentation' could use some work."

Cooking shows for dogs

Water. Food. Garnish.