Dog Training Humorist Pillows

"Of course I'm supposed to be on it. It's Barkolounger."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Obedience School/Disobedience School.

'I'd like to return this, please.'

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

"Now turn your head and bark."

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"Sometimes Bob wags when he's happy—but these days, it usually means he just tooted."

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

'He hasn't responded to training - he still insists on taking Alec to his slippers....'

Dogs texting each other emojis

"There are those who say I'm a throwback to Monet."

"I did, boss, I swear, I buried him myself."

'I bet he starts with a joke!'

"Look, Mommy. Puppy already knows a trick! What should we call him?" "How about 'Scooter.'"

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

"She never took to the leash."

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

"Well, if it wasn't you who meowed, and it certainly wasn't me who meowed...then...who...meowed?"

"I think that I shall never see a tree on which I wouldn't pee."

Dog leaving operating theatre in a hurry with a bone in his mouth

"House training's not so bad - you soon get used to it and, if you play your cards right, you'll get lots of treats."

Select a song: Another Dog Barking. Lots of Other Dogs Barking. Howling. Siren. Doorbell. Dog Karaoke.

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

"He would rather die than salivate!"

"My human can't tell which end is which."

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

'I'm afraid you're just going to have to accept that dogs just don't like you.'