Dog Decorator T-Shirts

"Have you been giving the dog a make over again?"

Dog Love.

"Ironically, this is the living room."

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

"I was almost that last year."

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

Painting the Ceiling

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

"I'm starting to think stripes."

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

Face Painting.

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Michelangelo is painting the Sistine Chapel ceiling and a priest comes to check how he's going - 'Michelangelo, what the hell is that? I just wanted a couple of coats of duck-egg blue!'

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

'Quick, press control Z!'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

Redecorating Easter Island.

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Early cave painters

Pollock Painting Company

"Love your feng shui!"

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Curtains haberdashery