Dog Decorator Pillows

"Have you been giving the dog a make over again?"

Dog Love.

"Ironically, this is the living room."

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Painting the Ceiling

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

"I was almost that last year."

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

Face Painting.

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"I'm starting to think stripes."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

Michelangelo is painting the Sistine Chapel ceiling and a priest comes to check how he's going - 'Michelangelo, what the hell is that? I just wanted a couple of coats of duck-egg blue!'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

'I wanted a change in decor.'

'Quick, press control Z!'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

"Hon, do you think the accent wall was a mistake?"

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

Redecorating Easter Island.

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

Early cave painters

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

"Well, I didn't have any more wall space, and I was also tired of being bald."

Curtains haberdashery

"Love your feng shui!"