Diy Punster Gifts

You can't beat a nice bit of skirting!

'Jurassic Pork.'

Dogs life

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

Note Book

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'Doctor, one placebo or two with your tea?'

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

A Tongue Stud.

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

"I call it decking - it will be all the rage in a few years."

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

Hamlet.

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

'To save the state the expense of a trial, I thought I'd run off to Spain.'

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

'I think he'll be okay. He had a mild brush stroke.'

Surfin' the web.

'I have a rasp in my throat.'

Timmy Gets Solitary.

"There's no need to call me names, Slime-Breath!"

'Come on, just a few more. I need to boost my metabolism.'

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

fried eggs...

'I hope you get an ice cream headache!'

Granny's Old Tyme Prostitute Chocolate Chip Cookies