Diving Humorist Gifts

'I said to come in 'full scuba gear', not 'Scooby gear'!'

He said he's a waterbed bug.

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

Bicycle sat nav.

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

Guide fish.

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

Walking the Plank.

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

Man painting MOM on boat

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Shark Chum

'We're drifting apart.'

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

Another hot flash?

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

Fish Farm.

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

"Nope, not a dock! Not a diving board! Guess again!"

'I got one this small.'