Divine Politics Debater Gifts

"I am so tired of his holier-than-thou attitude!"

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Gun laws US

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"He really isn't bad, per se, but he is kind of a jerk."

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

"I'm an agnostic now that I've started having self doubts."

Reagacentennial

"So join me in prayer for those who are damned if they do and damned if they don't..."

God Bless America, God Help Syria

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

Minister rubbishes private sector hospital initiative.

"Instead of Red Team and Blue Team, why don't we make it Good v. Evil?"

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

Trump promises versus reality.

Caution Bullet Ahead

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

"If someone tells you they lied, they are probably telling the truth."

John McCain, pre-RIP

The euro as a monster