Divine Laugh Seeker Pillows

'Now that's what I call a religious broadcast.'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"OMG, LOL!"

"What did Jesus order?"

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

"Projectile hairballing."

Drunk Barber

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

he used to belong to a cartoonist

"Hey! Get back here!"

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

Football heads...

Bald Man Overcomb

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

Jerk Gene

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

"Imagine! In the past year alone, Thomas Jefferson has learned to speak Swahili and play the glockenspiel."

"Looks like we're in trouble now...he's got four bars on that thing."

Comedy Store - Canned Laughter delivery.