Divine Cyclist Gifts

Give Way To Cyclists

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

'I can't stand his 'holier than thou' attitude.'

"Beware of God"

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

"The amendments are coming next week!"

Vicar's driving lesson "Here endeth the first lesson!"

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

'Telling me He works in mysterious ways!'

Golfing with God.

And the Lord said: 'I created the universe. What on earth makes you think I'll be impressed by a dead goat?'

"Blasphemy, yes, but it was funny."

"The first bill is always a shock-everyone thinks Heaven will be free."

"Relax, I grade on the curve."

A angel wearing a helmet poised to throw a football down from heaven.

'I knew I should've used the fluorescent golf balls.'

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

The Pope's bags getting carried by an angel.

Round-the-world cyclist has world stolen

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

Rock Climber and Angel Selfie

"Is he the God of the Old or the New Testament this morning?"

Moses parts water on the fairways.

'Your prayer is important to us. Please stay on your knees for the next available God.'

A leap of faith.

Heaven - under new management.

'What you did was not only 'wrong' - it was 'wrongedy-wrong-wrong!''

"Wow! I guess you CAN 'take it with you', after all!"

'Sorry -- that's not on our list of approved churches.'