Divination Pillows

'Fortunes, Impressions, Hunches, Wild Guesses'

Will explain the Fed's next move - $25.

'Sorry, I don't do financial advice.'

'We should have seen it coming.'

"You will fall backward. But eventually you will spring ahead."

"You had a great summer and you're going to have a great fall."

'I remember when tea leaves were the state of the art method of determining your inventory needs.'

"I've made contact with your mother. She says she hates what you're wearing."

'We'll start with the minutes of next year's AGM.'

"I see many gifts. They say do not open till Christmas."

"The algorithms that control your future say things are looking good. . ."

"Sometimes the future is bright, sometimes it's dark - it's all cyclical."

Fortunes. . .$20, Impressions. . .$10, Clenches. . . $5, Wild Guess. . . $2.

You Will Eat A Fortune Cookie.

'Shall we get started - You haven't got all day.'

Next week's hindsight today - The future is now next week.

"Why the silence?"

'This is where it gets tricky. I see 3 alternate endings and a director's cut.'

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

'I switched from tarot cards to a computer years ago.'

'Do you see a tall, dark formation of shale oil?'

Big Medium

'You're going on a journey.' - 'Will I find a place to park?'

Department of Futures: Hindsight and Foresight.

"A stranger is about to come into your life!"

"Your husband will meet a violent end."

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"On second thoughts... it might be better if you paid in advance."

'You meet Mister Right, house prices are down - Oops! I've got it upside down again!'

'You will go 3 for 5 tomorrow.'

"You will watch a new, totally mind-blowing TV series, only to forget about it completely a couple months later."

'You can't come in here with that.'

"I'll have to cance your appointment for next Friday. I'm going to be sick in bed with the flu."

"Now, right over here there's going to be some congestion, so get off I-95 and take the Hutchinson River Parkway."

"I get the sense there's some large body of water you're longing to return to - not a lake, maybe a sea? Is it an ocean?"