Dish Diva Gifts

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Where do we put Desserts?"

La Table

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"I'm so proud - she's already learning her shapes."

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"I come here for the pepper."

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

"Hmm...I LOVE chocolate chip ice cream...!"

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'I realize it's not on the menu but I'm on a diet and I'd like an air fern salad.'

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

"Excuse me, but could you ask the chef to make this a little more photogenic?"

"Larry never gains an ounce!"

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

Cow and Milk

"Why don't I clang some utensils, make 3 grilled cheese sandwiches and we call it an early night?"

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

'We've run out of Parmesan cheese.' Food in pasta.

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

"More croutons, sir?"