Dinner Party Disaster Enthusiasts Gifts

An Energetic Susan.

"You do like octopus?"

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

"Joel! Killer crust!"

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

How to make an unforgettable dinner for four

'..and if you must yawn tonight keep your mouth shut.'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

'Maybe getting gordon ramsay to do the after dinner speech wasn't such a good idea after all!'

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"I just love candle-lit dinners."

"Please forgive us for being so late- we had parking issues."

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

'Tea minus one hour thirty minutes and ten seconds.'

"Joyce! The poltergeist are having another dinner party!"

'I'm sorry, he likes to let off wind after dinner.'

'Sorry there's no food. We were kind of hoping you'd bring some.'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"We'd invite you to our place in the country but we're having it torched."

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"