Dinner Party Disaster Enthusiasts T-Shirts

An Energetic Susan.

"You do like octopus?"

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"Joel! Killer crust!"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

How to make an unforgettable dinner for four

'..and if you must yawn tonight keep your mouth shut.'

"The chef ran out of the shiitake-infused sweet potato au gratin, so he substituted hash browns."

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

'Maybe getting gordon ramsay to do the after dinner speech wasn't such a good idea after all!'

I don't do wishbones. I do just-make-it-happen bones.

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

The Kids' Table at the Last Supper

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

"Joyce! The poltergeist are having another dinner party!"

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

"Please forgive us for being so late- we had parking issues."

'I'm sorry, he likes to let off wind after dinner.'

'Tea minus one hour thirty minutes and ten seconds.'

"I just love candle-lit dinners."

'Sorry there's no food. We were kind of hoping you'd bring some.'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

If I have to eat another mouthful of that sludge I'm gonna puke...