Diner Server T-Shirts

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

DAVE'S DINER, ASK ABOUT OUR 'FLASH IN THE PAN' SPECIAL!

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

Countervailing Clichés.

'Who gets the decaf?'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'How is the water prepared?'

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

'Can I have flies with that'

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

'Regular or decapitated?'

'Waiter! -- there's a candidate in my soup!'

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.

Zagat Rated.

'Can I get a box for this?'

"I'll have the prayer breakfast."

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

'Our special of the day is spam sandwiches.'

'Yeah we found it, hey Ichabod, remember that jack o' lantern somebody left at table two this morning? Where is it?'

Gone out...here is a computer simulation of your dinner

Okay... which one of you ordered the holy mackerel?

'Careful, the plate is really hot.'

Chicken Coupe.

'Ralph, I'm gonna' need wings on the fly!'

Big Boy Foot

'Your tea is getting cold.'

"Would you like to see a dessert menu or do you not need a little treat after each meal?"

'You made me jump,'

"I am your bot server. Page me by phone and tip me in bitcoins."