Digital World Escapist Gifts

Cat Asleep on a Computer.

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

Second lifeReal life.

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

'Yes, John's here, but he can't come to the phone at the moment. He's had a hard day so he's taking some time in his bouncy saucer.'

Cyber Dream

The income gap is widening into a massive divide. Instability will follow. I'm not pleading for the middle class, I'm pleading for our future. House of Java .net Cybercafe. We can't have only rich and poor, for that was goes serfdom, instability, and eventually, collapse through inevitable revolution from below. Are you following what I'm saying? Are you listening? Not just listening. I'm listening while also playing Angry Birds. I've got no chance here, do I? Me either. The higher levels are br

"When catch-up TV finally catches up"

Some days Ted's head would get stuck for hours.

Hot Towel Web Service

SEMINAR CANCELLED: Feel free to doodle.

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

"I just did a huge one in my diaper."

"Gee... A wide screen, high-definition TV with Stereo-Gasm Sound and over 500 channels! It's almost like having a life!"

"Remember when we used to waste our entire lives for free?"

'Well you know the old saying... if you can't beat 'em you can always google someone who can.'

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

What's with our son? For once he's not online. I dealt with him. He's steaming mad. What did you do? I handled his addiction to texting, IM-ing, games and Facebook with calm maturity. Dad! Where did you hide my laptop?!! Modern maturity.

Why do you hate blockbuster movies? Why do you hate documentaries? I don't. I love spending two hours watching the very life I'm trying to escape. Oooh, fun, bittersweet insights into the complexities of living in modern life. Document this! My camera lens isn't wide enough.

"Read the comments, boss. . . we should rename the whole thing from 'social media' to 'antisocial media'."

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

Hits Needed, please click.

"Anywhere that doesn't have TVs, computers, radios, ipods, cell phones, or video games."

'We should be hibernating, not cybernating.'

"Goddess of Good give me strength! I must. . . get. . . off. . . the. . . internet!"

"Log into nature"

"Please excuse my husband his media bubble just burst."

"I’ve recently started self-medicating with viral pet videos."

Family separated by the Internet

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Message in a bottle.