Digital Realist Gifts

"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be taken out of context and put on Twitter and then it'll be a whole thing."

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

'Charlotte's Website' ('The children's book classic rewritten for the electronic era!')

"I have an imaginary friend called Fred, and my dad has one called Alexa."

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"He loves his computer but it's a love that's not returned."

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

'You don't have to worry about my future any more- I just downloaded an entire college education.'

Geek fairies

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

'Yes, it is large for a smart phone, but then it does do absolutely everything.'

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

i-teddy

"'What I wanted to do, but could not, during my socially-distanced summer vacation this year'..."

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

"Next meeting back to paper. Everyone missed doodle."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

Keep on Truckin.