Digital Era Observer Pillows

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

Weird things I do because of the internet

Two Generations of Readers

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

"Trust me, I'm a robot."

"Wow, these e-readers take forever to burn..."

Modern Life Blues

"The Internet ate my baby!"

"I hope you're not reading fake news."

"I love my new texting app, it automatically selects peoples preferred pronouns."

"Some fine day, my son, all this will be yours."

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

Smith and Hobson: People replacing people with apps and robots since 2009.

'It's no use! His computer tablet has replaced his blanky!'

"All this time I've been trying to get her to walk, and all it took was a phone."

"Ok, maybe this isn't happening."

"These feelings of yours aren't unusual - in fact, several of them have Web sites."

'I don't care what your chat group says. I say you're becoming overly dependent on technological gadgetry.'

"Go ask your search engine."

"Don't be a dummy, Justin - You gotta learn your ABC's so you can Google stuff."

After the summer holidays

"I was pretty highly respected until email came along."

"You kids are losing your ability to communicate person-to-person...so we're having a good old-fashioned family talk!"

"Our records show that you unsubscribed to our company's e-newsletter. We need to have a little talk."

'Data, data everywhere!'

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

Upgrade to premium to enjoy this dream without ad interruptions.

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

The six stages of hard drive death and dying.