Digital Era Reflecter Pillows

"I'm impressed! Junior actually asked to use our old-fashioned dictionary!"

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Weird things I do because of the internet

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Two Generations of Readers

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

Modern Life Blues

"Wow, these e-readers take forever to burn..."

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

"I hope you're not reading fake news."

Smith and Hobson: People replacing people with apps and robots since 2009.

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

"All this time I've been trying to get her to walk, and all it took was a phone."

"I love my new texting app, it automatically selects peoples preferred pronouns."

"Some fine day, my son, all this will be yours."

"These feelings of yours aren't unusual - in fact, several of them have Web sites."

'I don't care what your chat group says. I say you're becoming overly dependent on technological gadgetry.'

"Go ask your search engine."

After the summer holidays

"Don't be a dummy, Justin - You gotta learn your ABC's so you can Google stuff."

"You kids are losing your ability to communicate person-to-person...so we're having a good old-fashioned family talk!"

"I was pretty highly respected until email came along."

'Data, data everywhere!'

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

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