Digital Communication Specialist Pillows

"I haven't sunk my teeth into a mailman's butt in months. I hate e-mail."

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays the E-Mailman from the swift completion of his appointed rounds.

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

Dialogue

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"Textin’"

"Did you get my tweet?"

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Ruddy bloggers!

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

"We hardly ever intercept hard copy notes anymore, Stanley."

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

Information...political rhetoric

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

Spam in Hell.

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

'Hey! I sad, 'You've got mail!''