Digital Communications Specialist Pillows

"No one reads them, all wisdom flows on WhatsApp now."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

21st century water cooler conversations.

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Dialogue

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

"Did you get my tweet?"

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"Textin’"

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

Ruddy bloggers!

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

"We hardly ever intercept hard copy notes anymore, Stanley."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

Information...political rhetoric

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

Spam in Hell.

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

I just hope my doctor is not on twitter too!

'Hey! I sad, 'You've got mail!''

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

It's not a bad planet -- Their talk shows make it seem a lot worse than it is.