Digestion Gifts

"All those in favor of adding another 5 billion organisms to our probiotic just for the fun of it..."

'Good-bye gum, you've been a great friend these last seven years.'

You' ll pleased to know that I'm in complete harmony with my bowels.

'I sent out for everything.'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

'How very Cumbria.'

'Now here's a place I like!'

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

Dr, Wagner's dental floss spider web made going to the dentist much more appealing to kids,

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

'It's no problem, Mom. Samantha just likes to check on my table manners.'

'When you said you had an investment in gold, you didn't mention it was in your teeth!'

'On second thought, perhaps it would look better if your hand was tucked into your jacket.'

Oct. 1982: Researchers attempt an ill-fated procedure in great white shark oral hygiene.

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

"Valet park only"

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

Opening the Barrel

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'Couldn't you think of anything to say to Herb and Mary? They were nice enough to invite us over.'

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'