Diet Dynamics Gifts

'As it's your birthday, I think I'll have a pudding.'

"Where do we put Desserts?"

Soup of the month.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

The discovery of asparagus.

Before/After

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

'Vegetarian is an old Indian word which means bad hunter.'

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

'Come on, eat your spinach.' -' Sorry, I'm on a special diet...No toxic waste.'

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

'The kids are on a hunger strike, I'm on a diet, and you're on your own.'

Macho Vegetarian

"You won’t need refills."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.