Diet Divas T-Shirts

"Twice a week I eat nothing but fruit."

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

George's diet was a tad too successful.

"How many, 'This will go right to my hips' in a jelly donut?"

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Where do we put Desserts?"

La Table

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Like death by salad.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

Secretive Weigh In.

"I come here for the pepper."

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

Critisize your weight.

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

"I lost 20lbs on my diet. I guess it's time for a relapse."