Diet Discourse Enthusiast Gifts

Thinking of Hunger

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

All Natural Nothing

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

'I can't see my nuts anymore.'

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

Fat man on scales.

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

'This high fiber diet is great! I've lost 10 pounds since I started eating my stuffing.'

I can't decide what to read, Gourmet or Weight Watchers.

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"I would kill for your metabolism."

'Id like to see you in two weeks. Try not to eat during that time.'