Diet Achievement Gifts

Woman stands on scales, holds bunch of balloons.

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

Soup of the month.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

The discovery of asparagus.

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

'Vegetarian is an old Indian word which means bad hunter.'

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

Macho Vegetarian

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

'You strap it on and it monitors your eating habits -- it's called the 'Fudgebuster.''

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

"Would you like to see today's liquidized menu?"

"You won’t need refills."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

'Most, yes, but they're not all carcinogenic!'

'He's on a high carbohydrate diet,'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

"Some doctor that guy is - He's OBSESSED with diet and exercise!"

'You're eating too much roughage.'

“Children hate me.”