Diet Achievement Gifts

Woman stands on scales, holds bunch of balloons.

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

Soup of the month.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

The discovery of asparagus.

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

'Vegetarian is an old Indian word which means bad hunter.'

Shawn considered himself a vegetarian by proxy.

"You won’t need refills."

Looking at magnetic polarity one understands why an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

"Would you like to see today's liquidized menu?"

Macho Vegetarian

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

'You strap it on and it monitors your eating habits -- it's called the 'Fudgebuster.''

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

'He's on a high carbohydrate diet,'

'Most, yes, but they're not all carcinogenic!'

"Some doctor that guy is - He's OBSESSED with diet and exercise!"

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

“Children hate me.”

"Frankly Mr. Watkins - all your current health issues are down to you rubbish diet..."

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'