Diaper Warriors Gifts

'Let's get ready for daycare!!'

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

A Tit for Tat.

"That is one absorbent nappy."

"They look so young and helpless."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

'sugar and spice my eye.'

'That never gets old.'

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

'I tried those once. They leaked.'

Free Hugs

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"I think this end is loaded."

'Oh Sit down again and read your paper!'

"Does it come with instructions?"

'Did you know that baby birds just hang it over the edge of their nest and let it fly!'

"When I said change the baby, I meant his diapers!"

Man disposes of baby's nappy in a toxin waste bin.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Mum inspects poo'

Smiling at people who make stupid noises, wearing diapers, crying at least 8 times a night, getting cuddled by wrinkled grandparents... Man, being a baby is the World's hardest job!

"We can only apologise, Mr. Kent. But wouldn't you think that a superhero's uniform would be shrink-proofed?"

Never Ask A Man To Change The Baby.

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

'Another common mistake is to forget to take off the dirty nappy before putting the clean one on.'

'Here, take this. It came in handy when I used to change your nappy.'

Baby Thoughts in Nappy Changing.

The five stages of laundry 1. Denial I'll do it tomorrow. 2. Anger Why are there no clean clothes!? 3. Bargaining Ok! Who wants to help with the laundry? 4. Depression Can't. Do. It. 5. Acceptance

'But that's the baby you took in.'

Kitchen Appliances Fed Up With The Baby.

"It's as if I never left work, all day long on a turd processor"

"Well he smells like his father."

'creamed peas excepted.'

"Geez. He's bald. No teeth. And craps in diapers."

Why it's called child-rearing.