Diaper Duty Daredevil Gifts

"They look so young and helpless."

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"That is one absorbent nappy."

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

Changing the baby.

"Which end does the diaper go on 'cause there's stuff comin' out of both of 'em!"

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

'That never gets old.'

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

Parenting magazines.

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

'Did you know that baby birds just hang it over the edge of their nest and let it fly!'

'Oh Sit down again and read your paper!'

"Does it come with instructions?"

"When I said change the baby, I meant his diapers!"

Gas Mask.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Mum inspects poo'

"At first it was difficult having a new baby. But now I'm doing fine!"

Smiling at people who make stupid noises, wearing diapers, crying at least 8 times a night, getting cuddled by wrinkled grandparents... Man, being a baby is the World's hardest job!

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

'Another common mistake is to forget to take off the dirty nappy before putting the clean one on.'

'Here, take this. It came in handy when I used to change your nappy.'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: Mother examines baby's faeces

'That is one absorbent nappy.'

'But that's the baby you took in.'

"It's as if I never left work, all day long on a turd processor"

"Well he smells like his father."

'Occupational hazard.'

'Changing diapers isn't so bad, as long as you don't look down.'

Baby Thoughts in Nappy Changing.

"Geez. He's bald. No teeth. And craps in diapers."

"Awww....someone's done a pooping in their pants. How cute?"

Why it's called child-rearing.

"Tell us everything you know and we'll see what we can do about a fresh diaper."