Diaper Diva Gifts

A Tit for Tat.

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"That is one absorbent nappy."

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

"They look so young and helpless."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

Cow and Milk

'That never gets old.'

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

Look at it this way: You're changing the future of the nation...one diaper at a time!

'When I had my baby I learned the meaning of 24/7.'

"This diaper makes my butt look big..."

What female dogs think about their looks.

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"When I said change the baby, I meant his diapers!"

'Oh Sit down again and read your paper!'

'Did you know that baby birds just hang it over the edge of their nest and let it fly!'

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

Smiling at people who make stupid noises, wearing diapers, crying at least 8 times a night, getting cuddled by wrinkled grandparents... Man, being a baby is the World's hardest job!

'Another common mistake is to forget to take off the dirty nappy before putting the clean one on.'

'Here, take this. It came in handy when I used to change your nappy.'

Baby Thoughts in Nappy Changing.

"It's as if I never left work, all day long on a turd processor"

"Geez. He's bald. No teeth. And craps in diapers."

Why it's called child-rearing.

'But that's the baby you took in.'

'I really don't like breast-feeding, but it's really good therapy for her.'

'Let's get ready for daycare!!'

"Have you been giving the dog a make over again?"

Jim was always willing to help out with the baby wherever he could.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: What's that stuff by the light switch?

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I might find the colostrum?"