Dialogue Strategist Gifts

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

Meet the Enemy

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

"May I remind you that we can always go with duck eggs."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"What other skills do you obtain other than being able to answer interview questions?"

"To be clear you are willing to labor under misconceptions?"

'Maybe we should have been a bit more specific in the ad...'

These young people need everything spelled out to them! I miss the old days, when a wink was a wink, and a nod was a nod.

"And just how long have you been, 5' 10"?"

'...the job is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing.'

'There you go again - trying to solve my problems. I am not asking you to do that. I just want you to listen to me.'

'What say we set aside all our petty grievances and just hate each other on general principles.'

"You should hire me now, before my skills completely deteriorate."

"You kids are losing your ability to communicate person-to-person...so we're having a good old-fashioned family talk!"

"Where would you say you are on the confidence/cockiness spectrum?"

"Before you ask for a raise, I need you to be aware I've got a map of your brain on my mobile."

'Of course, it's your business, but I wouldn't ever start a resume with 'Once upon a time in a land far far away!''

"I'm going to be a lawyer so I'll be arguing both sides."

"Since you became a management consultant we don't seem to speak sense any more."

"You look perfectly suited for managing on the pigeons have a salary that goes with the job!"

"He gave me an 'F' on my resume."

'Right...we've agreed to mediation to decide whether or not we go to mediation!'

"Effective and CLEAR communication with customers is ESSENTIAL so we're going to practise drilling down to identify core interpersonal information transfer methodologies to accelerate a meaningful dialogue."

'Him? Oh, he's my job interview coach.'

'Tell me, Mr Tolteck, have you applied for the headhunter or the key account manager position?'

"You claim on your résumé that one of your skills is staying calm under stressful situations. I believe you."

'Just a tip, never be the bearer of bad news - people will automatically blame you for it...'

"O.K., Jimbo, let's dance with wolves."

"I see we're all going into this interview a little superstitious."

"Can you send me a text so I can use it as a ruse to get out of this conversation?"