Devotee Of Divine Dips Pillows

"Hold up ... where’s the ranch dressing?"

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

Bubble Gum Dispenser

"My lessons on Enlightenment are a prerequisite to my graduate-level course on Investing in Derivatives."

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

'Could you guys play a slow number so my gal and I can dance?'

"Yes, they come out white than white, but when they went in they were blue."

"We've done it! We've done it! We've discovered a detergent that takes the chore out of washing and makes all other detergents seem old-fashioned by comparison!"

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

Weinberg's egregious error would damage his reputation forever, His colleagues would thereafter refer to him as 'the big double dipper,

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

Dante Alighieri

'I wish we could find a quick and easy way to remove blood stains...'

'It will bring economic benefits to the North and Midlands.'

'So what if she only brew a few cases a year. We can still do business.'

No news is good news.

Paradise: Collection of wine

Those four microwave dings you just heard indicate that dinner is ready, Lance. Hop to it! Unlike some individuals I know, I am not one of Pavlov's wolverines.

Gym. He claims he does that routine for an hour before starting his cardio workout. Do you believe him? It's a bit of a stretch!

'Shakin' bacon.'

'Don't drink on an empty head.'

"I was deadwood but I'm out of a job. I guess I'm driftwood."

"It has a nice, divine quality without being overly liturgical."

"Up here, we call it 'Nectar of the Gods' not 'Devil's Brew'!"

'I'm having what he's having.'

A criminal dances for a police officer in an attempt to delay being put into jail.