Detox Devotees Gifts

"I'm on a detox cleanse, so I'll wait for a vegetarian."

Be Healthy

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

"Lately, I've been trying to spend less time staring at the glowing orb."

America Off-line.

"But I brought you here so I wouldn't have to play with you."

"Listen, pal, they're all emergencies."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

'No, that doesn't make any difference either, Miss Jones.'

"She's late for her stress management course."

The Colonel at home.

"Behold, Penny. The 'Wi-Fi dead zone.'"

The Garra Rufa's idea of a Grand Day Out.

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

"Let's bury the TV remote and all the cell phones, then sit back and watch what happens."

Screen Time at the Dining Table

"For your enjoyment: Please turn off electronic devices, close your eyes, and cover your ears."

Deposit phones here

"Isn't this so much better without our devices?"

'How is the detox going?'

"No thanks, I'm on a juicebook cleanse this week."

"Hello, police? I'd like to report some suspicious activity. A youth without a phone in his hand."

'I envy your metabolism.'

Well that's me detoxed!

NIl by 'phone.

Captain's Log: Day 3 of Polly's cracker detox was a tough one...

"Come home when the internet's back on."

"I haven't seen you look at your me-phone for five whole minutes. What gives?"

"I agree, it's a real worry. We may have to consider limiting her screen time."

"If you're happy and you know it, stick with your dosage."

"How long do you think it'll take before he realizes I took his phone away?"