Detour Dodger Gifts

Road Construction.

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

"It's essential I go to work to avoid being with my family."

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

"At work, we've switched to video calls for meetings, so my productivity has shot up exponentially. . ."

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

'Confused about your future, depressed, lacking confidence, not sure who you can trust...I'd suggest you avoid any election news and watch modern family instead.'

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

Gentlemen, I'm off to join the circus

'Oh Great. We just missed the once a millennia bus out.'

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

'9K a year!? It's an outrage! At my level of attendance that's 3K per lecture!'

Psychology: Module 1 . . . . Attention span.

'Dad said that experience is the best teacher, so I cut school and went to the video arcade.'

"Are you listening to me?"

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

'We should try harder to behave. We're wearing a rut in this floor.'

Motivation

'Do you mind? I'm trying to read.'

"Excuse me, is this the third turning on the left?"

"My teacher wants to talk to you? Wow. What did you do wrong?"

Susan unexpectedly found herself living life in the fast lane due to a road detour.

"You recused yourself from this case. I recuse myself from jury duty."

Still going in circles. 'Told you so.'

"Now that the person chewing gum so loudly has finally stopped, perhaps we can all pay attention to what I'm doing here."

'Phone-b-gone, gets rid of unwanted phones.'

Road Closed: Next Left: Nowhere in particular.

Why men hate to stop and ask for directions.