Detective Fiction T-Shirts

Sherlock Holmes and the case of the missing cocaine

"Quick! Follow that dish and spoon!"

Detective Honky

'Hands up!', 'Where are you going with this?'

I'm not avoiding you!

The Philip Marlow family

'Don't worry, Mr. Scott, we'lll find your wife. We're checking all the malls now.'

"Hmmm...this'll be a tough one..."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

"Elementary, my dear Watson- the cartoonist did it."

Joan Hickson

The Elliot Ness monster.

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'Listen up, Baskerville! This is MacDonald! Those hounds of yours are scaring the E-I-E-I-O out of my animals!'

'You know bank pens never work. Why didn't you write the holdup note before we left?!'

"Puss in cement boots"

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

Marriage a la Mode - Death of the Earl.

"That's hardly necessary!"

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."