Desk Disorder Devotee Pillows

I came in early to seize the day...but it seized me first.

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

Working 9 to 5.

Office Ergonomics.

"I thought that modern communications systems were meant to be more efficient...That they would cut down on waste and duplication."

The token incompetent: "Hey - don't ask me."

'I'll be a little late with those reports, sir -- my desk organizer crashed.'

'Wow, my own desk!'

International House of Paperwork

"I'm sure you do spend all your time here at the office, but could you please stop having your mail delivered here?"

Working Vacation.

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

"People whinge about the irrelevance and duplication of paperwork, but if the forms aren't filled out how are we supposed to know how many forms have been completed?"

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

'It's all right. I'm just a little behind.'

Still Here

"My one regret is that I didn't spend more quality time with my office."

In, Out and Out of Sight.

Inbox, Outbox, and Down & Out Box.

101 uses of a dead cat: desk spike

Desk sale

"I'm an assistance dog."

"Actually the salary isn't important. . . I just need a desk to rest my feet on."

The longer you work with some people, the more they can annoy you..just by being there.

'I'm afraid that we can't insure you. Our records indicate that you only have one life left'

'Well, we were told he has a penchant for micro managing

Input (not yours) and Output (only mine).

"If your internet doesn't work, please check our online help chat...if your internet doesn't work..."

Reception often dictates reality.

The side effect of the standing desk craze.

Director of Lateral Thinking

"Can I help you?"