Desk Dining Devotee Gifts

Sushi

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

Hello. I'm Ferdinand. I'll be monitoring the levels of bull at your table this evening. Menu. Menu.

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'I'm delegating everything but my paycheck and my snazzy office to you.'

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

Diner

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

Working 9 to 5.

"Expense account or regular?"

Office Ergonomics.

"I thought that modern communications systems were meant to be more efficient...That they would cut down on waste and duplication."

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

"The waiter said he wouldn't recommend the octopus, so what do you order? The octopus."

'How would you like your toast?'

'...and one 'death by chocolate', Sir.'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

'Wow, my own desk!'

Emily's Slow Food Restaurant.

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

"A votre sante!"

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

I came in early to seize the day...but it seized me first.

'Would you folks care for some fresh maple syrup on your pancakes?'

A train's dining car is a diner.

"People whinge about the irrelevance and duplication of paperwork, but if the forms aren't filled out how are we supposed to know how many forms have been completed?"

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

"Just a drop."

International House of Paperwork