Dental Visit Humorist Gifts

'Yes I floss regularly. Once every 6 months when I come here!'

"Pollyanna, your teeth are shot. Stop sugar coating everything!"

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

Tooth fairy

"Aperitif?"

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

The New Age Dentist.

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

I see braces in his future.

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

The songwriter who wrote a bridge about his bridge.

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

'I'm worried: He doesn't have buckteeth...'

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

"No, we haven't started yet. My hand was cold."

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

Dentist in ashes - 'Have you been eating garlic?'

'Do you offer transcend dental medication?'

"I had them sharpened so I can eat cows."

Dentist Speak - Monologues

'At least you're not going to have to worry about your denture adhesive anymore.'

"You've been grinding your fangs."

"Remove your shoes and socks. We ran out of laughing gas"

Steven Tyler's toothbrush.

'If you find any loose ones, I have dibs on them for the tooth fairy.'

"Have a seat. She's not ready. She's still in her whitening strip."

Dentist Suction

"It's teeth whitening."

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

F&E Dentistry. Happy Halloween. That pumpkin doesn't have any teeth! He never brushed --- It's a plaque-o-lantern.

'We only have rooms with real teeth left!'

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."