Dental Appointments Gifts

"No, we haven't started yet. My hand was cold."

No, that's "high." I said, "open wide."

It's payback time at the sadistic dentist's office.

'Well, well, well...'

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

'Reflexes seem normal. You kept him waiting over two hours.'

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

'Um, can I get a FOURTH opinion?'

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

'He said I have no cavities and that my breath knocked his socks off.'

'So you're off to see the chiropodist... the only time in your life you shouldn't put your best foot forward!'

"That explains all the cavities."

"You've got bunions, hammertoes and plantar fasciitis. Bad feet must run in your family." "Nobody runs in my family."

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

"Every time you lick your teeth, you taste your skeleton."

Here's my dental insurance card. Sorry. Twig had a visit within the last 6 months. This one's not covered. That was a check-up. This is an emergency. How about Twig's chipped tooth? Your policy doesn't cover cosmetic problems. Now I get it! My insurance is cosmetic. Have a nice day!

Patient to Doctor: 'This may hurt a little.'

'...Do you have an appointment...?'

Yoga Dentist has sign on wall: 'Open Mouth Insert Foot'

"Relax. You might feel a little pinch."

'Tell you what; I'll give you the lollipop and I'll give you the shot.'

"I'll take your word for it. You don't have to show me your used floss."

"Actually, I didn't become dizzy and nauseous until I started inhaling the scent strips in the waiting room magazines."

To help emphasize good oral hygeine inkids, Dr. Remford installed a dental floss zipline in his office.

Sewing Machines in Surgery

The Wheel of Life

"Wednesday proctology clinic."

Taking blood pressure

"Now where was I?"

Medical Exam

"He hates his six-monthly visits."

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

Time-Off Coupons